GREEN THUMB

matthew jay - please don't send me away

the smell of precarious mold within the dirt of my dad's plants plus the bird's eye view of my neighbourhood on any given sunday;
staring back at me with green hope, green road, green field, green dream.
my favorite pastime strikes as sweet and tame.
the green parades in my brain - a newfound exploration comes searching for me once again.
*feed yourself with my blog and store instagram; a lively adventure soon to come!

A LONESOME MARRIAGE

sebadoh - spoiled

hello, digitalism.
i suppose my detachment from the cyber world is long-lost. a writer's block is the utter cause of all sense, but very well worth the time.
i am back to be intrigued by the words in papers most of these days - a solution less obsolete to the cure of my anxious insomnia by night.
the internet absolutely derails my body in peace, and i despise such effect growing on my brains.
trailing through the waves with the sunlight reflecting on my skin whilst swimming like nuts gives me a refreshing fix,
so i shall be wise enough not to be glued in front of the screen 24-7.
i am not totally whole from an online self-destruction, but oh welps, i'm paving my way in.
PS. if you miss me, you can just chase me on my instagram, both blog and store. i am there daily.
PS2. don't be a crying baby, i will still blog.

REVERSE

the careful ones - paper knees

"when i finally write the first sentence,
i want to know everything that happens,
so that i am not inventing the story as i write it
rather, i am remembering a story that has already happened."
- john irving

at swim two birds - darling

the longest wait has come to an end. abandonment never feels this good.
closely on the verge of going insane, i let the cyber mirage slip away like it never existed
and rather chose the path of real-life amusement to the extent of what i wistfully need.
being a stranger in my homeland guided by a very foreign someone worth running away with, i never doubted discipline.
a sorrow of change, a move towards the better-recharged dreams - they are all beyond me.
here i return to the same place i used to stand.
i took hold of my heart once again. it wasn't there.
ps. i just got myself into another technological burden called 'instagram'. fetch me.

"dear tyler knott gregson,
all work and no play makes me a dull and repetitive young lady.
my unposted version of bali retrospection from last year (yes, that ancient)
should praise your soul much more alive than mine that has been long dead.
i will summon into mind how much i have always loved to swim,
and promise not to spend so much time treading illusional water and sinking my head over computer libraries.
fingers crossed,
- polluted."

nothing perks me up more than the unexpected visit to macau, 

a place where you can get lost forever apart from all the gambling. 

walking along the streets, witnessing the life scenes, and aimlessly capturing the neglected settings to our random rituals. 

the most harmonious perfection and a dash of charm combined in the absolute ordinary - far to the extent your eyes can travel.

why not singing the wanderer's tunes? 

pardon my french overexaggeration.

funny how a certain fascination can feel so familiar within itself.

even when you are moving into a strange direction in a strange land, the isolated wind blow can accompany you along the way.

and now i know. the commonplace for the mind may not need to be intimate.

it says far much better with distance - to actually feel bonded in spirits than the close existence,

to feel happy even without moving the corner of your lips to smile.

only us to feel younger than yesterday, it is that easy.

i have always enjoyed watching the world through the lens,

but there are days when i want to stare at the scenes only with my eyes and nothing more.

so then, i have to be extra careful as the virtual stimulus keeps fooling me.

it might sound creepily "touchy" of me to feel for what adam sackler blasted at hannah horvath on girls' season finale,

"here’s the world's smallest tiny violin playing, "my heart bleeds for you"!

you don't know struggle. i’m a beautiful fucking mystery to you."

is it just me or also another way around?

i'm losing my remaining faith in my own sight. and somewhat humanity.

let's rather try some audible cracks.