andwhatelseisthere

my most honest post ever. and this has nothing to do with you.
i once read this quote about a white crayon.
this person was questioning an existence of a white crayon among the line of all these colorful crayons.
like why was it there? what did it want from people due to its existence?
"I" feel like the white crayon. sometimes.
i get tired of trying to stand out and be interesting with all such an attempt of looking merry and colorful and shit.
i am another soul searcher through just another online blog.
i am spending my anonymity and trying hard to be outstanding behind the laptop screen.
until recently, i feel like retiring. from all these facebook photos to act like you're interesting among your friends - your real-world friends.
or even a retweet, tweet, or twat for whateverfrigginreason just so you have many things to say.
i guess i am just better off acting uninterestingly demure on this blog.
even though it remains so secretive people wouldn't really give a damn anyway.
it's already too much work for me.
now i know what it's like to be in a close world where you don't really need real people at all.
and that's how i like it. it's irrational. and it's sick.
ps. please don't find any logical thinking behind this delusion. you can discuss, but i don't have an answer.